#NUMBER 149ONEHUNDRED&FORTYNINE
I’ve decided my life goal is to become rich enough to become addicted to plastic surgery. Oh the faces I would go through. I think I would eventually look something like Michael Jackson, but instead of bleached skin, I’ll be without skin at all. Okay, I’ll have just enough so that each of my bones will be entirely distinguishable from the next. Before that though, I will have liposuction to remove all my fat from my entire body and put it all into my lower eyelids, so I can look like one of those funny goldfish. You know, the ones with the huge bags for lower eyelids? I will be so glamorous! I can’t wait!

Am I the only one who cried at the news of Steve Irwin’s death? How terrible! He was such an enthusiastic entertainer, and a committed conservationist. I am surprised that George W. Bush didn’t declare war on those terrorist stingrays of the evil nation of The Great Barrier Reef. Oh Steven! WHY? I feel so sad for his wife and kids. I am also terribly depressed about the School shooting in Montreal. Them Frenchies are gonna give us Canadians a bad rep… Totally kidding! You can leave that to me!

I am also sad for all the friends who are off the Victoria and other locations for school. It’s a miss/jealously thing really. I unfortunately missed many goodbye parties, and for that I am terribly sorry. I will venture to visit you all!

Anyone else totally shocked that Tomkat made a gorgeous baby and not an alien? Hopefully she isn’t brainwashed Scientologist. I often wonder how celebrities get so stupid, but then I remember, they were all raped… or aaaalmost raped. AKA This one time their uncle looked at them and smiled.

In other celebrity gossip, that I for no reason that I can come up with care about, Poor Anna Nicole Smith. I can’t imagine what having the joy of a new daughter to the mourning of a son must be like. That would be so messed up.

In happier news! iPods just got WAY too cool. For those of you who have not yet seen the new Shuffle, it is the cutest thing I have seen in ages. It’s super tiny, clips anywhere, holds a gig of music, and a battery life of 12 hours. And for under $100, I think I may consider getting one. I still want a new video iPod despite having a perfectly fine non-video one. I think it’s really cool to have the possibility to watch movies and television on it, but a major pain that they are only available in the states. I actually probably would never watch movies on it unless I was on a bus trip or something, so I really don’t need one.

So The Set was here last night, and it was pretty awesome. I stayed at the front of the show with Katie and Aisha, and had a blast being pushed around by the moshpit behind me. I was sort of creeped out by the random who at one point started to gently run their finger up and down my spine. Awkward! Katie and I left after The Set’s set because we were tired, and so we had some tea at her apartment (Earl Grey with Jasmine) and then I walked home. My shoes really should be retired, but when I walk in them they make a soft beat that makes walking places fun. I was quietly whispering lyrics to the beat of my shoes as I walked home, and I actually wrote my first non-total crap song. Katie and I are now determined to construct a band. Though, this has happened many times before. Ha-ha

Katie, Kat and I were all wearing disgustingly GAP-like clothing today which turned into an on going, all through the day, joke. My favourite was when we were lying in the sun at the school field.

Katie: This is SUCH a GAP ad.
Me: But there are bugs. There are no Bugs in GAP ads!

For the past forever, Katie, Kat and I have been known to randomly break out into song and interpretative dance, and as luck would have it the past two days have been chalked full of it. It started two nights ago when Katie didn’t want to sleep alone at her apartment. She came over and we watched Josie and the Pussycats, and when we were supposed to be sleeping we were coming up with the most random bull. There was hiding under the blankets from ghosts and zombies, and discussions about how hiding under the blankets perfects you from scariness. And then there was the sharing of dreams (coming soon) and then the talk of portals, and how ‘fart’ can be used to make songs and entire novels comedy (“Everybody -----“ and “---- of Darkness”) and then last, the beginning of all the song and dance. My blanket had somehow got stuck under the barbell next to me, and so when I freed it I sang “Cant hold us down!” In reference to the song by Christina Aguilera. We were sleep deprived, so I was all very funny to us at the time.

The next day we were on our way to complete a few errands and found that we had “Total Eclipse of the Heart” stuck in our heads. We were singing and walking and being overly expressive, and then it hit; “Eternal Flame”. We were acting retarded! Soon we were remixing “My Humps” with “Hot in Herre”. “I am getting so hot, I’m gonna take my humps, my humps, my humps…” Then it got obscene with a little “When I think about you I wanna fuck you like an animal”. While being GAP kids today we continued our ways, while also reminiscing about such unfortunate hits as “Liquid Dream”. Has everyone seen that Audrey Hepburn commercial for GAP? It verges on the cutest flashback ever. CLICKYCLICKYCLICK

I know there are a million things I should blog about, but I am going to have to sleep now.

I shall finish with a little act of hilarity that I wish everyone had witnessed for its “at the time” value. Amberlee, Sarah and I were chilling in the living room when the undeniable urge to intrude my father’s wallet creeped upon Amberlee. When she opened it and saw the photo of my dad inside, she quietly whispered, “Papa?” SO FUNNY! I was laughing so hard for a good half hour and then I would crack up again randomly when I thought about it. Oh the tears of laughter.

LATER!



Note to self: Get Cellular Phone